Everyday Laurali Star

Life As a Solitary Green Witch!

Love Magic: The Qualities I'm Looking For in My Next Relationship


Flowers in the dark fairy forest pink and green botanical style mix

Welcome to love magic and the qualities I'm looking for in my next relationship! The last time I wrote a soulmate and twin flame post, something magical happened. The very next day a guy knocked on my door and we ended up going on a date!

Awe, the infamous hiking date. Many of you know that guy ended up being a false twin flame and things didn't end up working out.

What I didn't know when I went on that date was that I had already met my true twin flame. In fact, as things were building up between us the first half of the year, I had no idea why I felt so drawn and connected to him.

It wasn't until this summer, after undergoing a twin flame separation that resulted in soul shock, that I came to understand who he was to me. Before that, I only knew we had an intense sexual attraction and soul connection.

Recently, I have come to the conclusion that we may have just come into each other's lives to create a spiritual awakening. It was upon meeting him that the true kundalini awakening began to uncoil like a snake within me.

Regardless, I'm finally at a place of peace and acceptance that we may not end up together. I feel like it's time for me to try and move on with my life and put myself out into the dating world again.

I'm not one of those people that thinks you have to spend your life waiting for someone to come around, hoping someday they'll be ready. He's going through a dark night of the soul experience and I'm going through my kundalini awakening.

I've had to completely surrender this relationship over to the universe, which hasn't been easy on me. In the meantime, I'm trying to move forward fearlessly, which the full moon in Aries has helped me to do!

So, last night I did a graveyard dirt love spell with sigil magick!  I'll share my secret love spell at the end of the post.  This love magic blog post is the second half of my spell!

You can read more about my romantic love life by reading, Love Magic: The Qualities I'm Looking For in a Man!  That was the post that got me back out into the dating world again.  Well, sorta.  

Without further ado, here are the qualities that I want in my next relationship!  It seems the more men I meet, the more I learn about what I do and don't want in a relationship.  It's really helped me to weed the garden of my love life.  

A pink flower bud in summer, black background in a dark fairy forest, and green plant stems and biology of wildlife

Love Magic: The Qualities I'm Looking For in My Next Relationship

I'm looking for a man who knows what he wants (me) and isn't confusing about it!  One of the biggest things I've noticed with the men I meet is that no one seems to be clear about what they want.  

Maybe I'm attracting these confusing men because I myself am confused about what I want in a relationship.  Especially in the case with my twin flame, we seemed to be mirroring each other in that way.

Whatever the case may be, I'm not confused about what I want anymore.  It seems with every date or relationship, it only works to refine my dealbreakers even more.  It narrows down the list of what kind of romantic relationship I'd like to have.  

First of all, twin flame relationships aren't all they are cracked up to be.  They are difficult relationships that really make you question everything in life.  Every person has a twin flame, but not every twin flame will find one another or end up together.  

Yes, the dream would be to be with my twin flame and work things out and live happily ever after.  But, life doesn't always work that way.  It's not always rainbows and unicorns, you know.  

However, that being said, twin flames really do foster exponential growth to each flame and that's necessary when you are on a spiritual path.  Together or solo, twin flames are here to make the world a better place.  

Soulmates can be trying relationships too, as well as karmic relationships.  At the end of the day, I'm finding we really have to do the work on ourselves, and whatever happens, happens.  

The only thing I know for certain is that I'm ready for love, so someone who's less confusing and is clear on what he wants would be great.  Next, I'd really like to have a relationship where we have good communication.  

I see my daughters getting into relationships where they feel they can't communicate with their partner and resentments build up.  I know in the past, I haven't been the best role model for them in love relationships.  I used to put up with a lot of abuse, mentally and physically, before I would leave the relationship.

So, definitely being able to have open and honest communication in my next relationship would be at the top of my list!  I think miscommunication is what caused me and my twin flame to separate in the first place.  

I also want a healthy relationship!  Obviously, having good communication would help with that.  I want a relationship where we get along most of the time.  

It's not a good sign when there's fighting in a relationship, especially in the beginning.  It means that there are communication issues and karmic baggage that needs to be worked through.  

I've worked through a lot of that, so I'm hoping to meet a man who is emotionally mature and able to communicate his needs and wants to me.  I want a man who is healthy enough to work things out with me instead of taking off and avoiding me.  

I also want a healthy sex life!  I feel like sex is one of the most important parts of a healthy relationship.  If the sex is good and the chemistry is good, I believe that makes a huge difference in the longevity of a relationship.  

Plus, I have been saving myself for the right man for almost nine years.  That's a long time to wait to have crappy sex with someone.  I'm looking for an emotional connection during sex.  

This next quality I'm looking for is a kind of surface quality, but I feel it's important to meet someone to share my life together with.  I'd like to meet someone who lives here in the tiny, seaside fishing village I live in and I'd like to eventually travel the United States with him when this whole coronavirus thing is done and over.  

It's just something I've always wanted.  My kiddos are grown and I have a lot of freedom to do whatever I want now.  I'd love to meet a man that I can go on adventures with!

I'm very outdoorsy, in case you hadn't guessed it.  I love to go on mini-hiking adventures and travel to see things like the world's largest mushroom.  That's my idea of fun!

I'd also like my next relationship to be with someone who is ready for a relationship.  I keep meeting these men who are the right age and everything, but they aren't ready.  I want someone who is ready to settle down and build a future with me.  

I'm definitely wifey material and I'd like to meet a man who sees the potential in that.  I'm 43-years old and I'm in a place in my life where I'd like to settle down and get married and live in marital bliss.  

I still and will always continue to want a man who I feel comfortable with.  It takes a minute for me to warm up to someone and I have a lot of trust issues with men.  Therefore, I want someone who will be kind, patient, and understanding with me.  

The man that sticks around is the man for me!  I have Borderline Personality Disorder and at its heart, it causes me major issues with abandonment, ghosting, and rejection.  A man who won't be scared away by my mental health issues would be a man after my own heart.  

I've been looking for that one guy that would stay.  I guess I still haven't met him yet, but here's hoping!  I have to believe that there are still good guys in the world.

I'd also like my next relationship to move fast!  There's nothing slow about me when I make up my mind about someone I want to be with.  

I'm an Aries with lots of fire in her chart and I don't do slow and steady wins the race.  Again, for me, it's about meeting someone who knows what they want and isn't afraid to ask me out or go for it!

Those are the qualities I'm looking for in my next relationship.  I want a healthy relationship and sex life.  I want someone who I can talk to and we communicate well together.

I want a man who is adventurous and fun, who will go camping, traveling, and hiking with me.  I can be very spontaneous when I want to be.  Again, it's my fiery Aries nature!

I want a man who knows what he wants and isn't afraid to ask for it.  With me, you've got to pretty much spell it out for me.  I can be quite clueless with men.  

If you want me, ask me on a date!  Make a move or go in for that kiss.  I'm sick of guys leaving it all up to me.  I like a man who is bold and ambitious!

Now that we got that out of the way, let's talk about that graveyard dirt love spell, shall we?  I did it on the day of the full moon in Aries when the magic in the air is enhanced!

Pink flower on the green in a state park in the Everglades of Florida

Secret Graveyard Dirt Love Spell

For my graveyard dirt love spell, also known as the "boyfriend spell" I created a sigil with the intention that I already have a new boyfriend who loves and adores me.  It's good to always place your intention into the future as if it's already done.

Again, for more on making a sigil, you might like to brush up on your skills with, Wishlist: How to Practice Sigil Magick For Instant Manifestations!  Making sigils to include in my magic has been a huge lift to the spells I do.  

Boyfriend Spell Ingredients:

  • Sigil Magick
  • Traditional (masturbation to activate the seal) Read this post on sex magick!
  • Goddess Aine (Moon Goddess of Love and Queen of the Fairies)
  • Graveyard Dirt collected from your local cemetery
  • Full Moon in Aries (you can always wait till the next full moon!)
  • 2 lodestones
  • Ground cinnamon powder
  • Bay leaves (enough to burn one every day until the next full moon)
  • A permanent marker
  • A blog or social media post or write qualities of your next relationship on a piece of paper
How to do new boyfriend spell:

First, create and activate your sigil the traditional way through sex magick!  You'll need to achieve an altered state of consciousness by staring at your symbol while you masturbate and achieve orgasm. This activates the seal!

Since this is a next-level magic spell, you'll want to then sprinkle graveyard dirt and ground cinnamon powder on the sigil that you make.  Add two lodestones to your symbol to enhance magnetic attraction and enhance your love life.

Next, lay your sigil, graveyard dirt and all, under the full moon, and let it soak up moon rays overnight.  You can do this up to three nights, including the height of the full moon.  

For the next step, you'll want to write the word "boyfriend" in permanent marker on a bay leaf.  On the back, write the words true love and draw some heart shapes on it.  Symbolism is very important in magick!

Burn the bay leaf over the cauldron or your kitchen sink as you call on Goddess Aine to send true love your way and make him stay!  Repeat this process all the way up to the next full moon.

The next day (the day after the full moon), you'll want to write a blog post, social media post, or a letter describing the love magic qualities you want in your next relationship!  Surrender the experience over to Goddess Aine in order to let her work her magic mojo on your love life.

Below, you'll find the incantations that I used for my love magic spell.  Feel free to rephrase things and make up your own words for personal use!

You might have noticed that I decided to narrow my pool down to the town that I live in.  You can use the same method for your hometown or the city you live in or widen the pool of men ( or women) if that's what you want to do!

You can say the incantations out loud, before, during, and after the spell.  I usually read my incantations before I begin activating the sigil and in the days that follow.  Do whatever works best for you and your craft!


Goddess Aine, bless this sigil, kiss the moon, sink the stars beneath my feet!  Aine, Aine, come to me, bring me a man who lives in Ozona, Florida, and make him come to me!

Goddess Aine, bring a man from Ozona, Florida to fall head-over-heels in love with me.  Goddess Aine, make it right, bring me, my true love, bring him tonight! (meaning activate this love spell tonight)

By the light of the full moon in Aries (insert moon here), send me a man to love me, send him my way.  Send me a new boyfriend, please make him stay!  By his own free will, let it be done, heal my heart, let the past be undone!

Then, be sure to thank the love goddess for all that she's done for you!  You can do that by leaving her an offering or writing about her on social media.  Anything that gravitates attention and respect to her will be greatly appreciated!

Thanks for reading about my love life and what I'm looking for in my next relationship!  I hope to keep growing, learning, and evolving as a person.  

This blog post acts as a love spell to take my love life to the next level and I'm sure it can do the same for you!  Never give up on love, no matter how long you've waited.  I know I'm not! xo

Hi, I'm Laurali! I write about moon magic and seasonal shifts and all things faery. about me


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